Lies, Shock, Disappointment, Heart-attack, Anger, Resentment…Murder??
I think every Nigerian woman has at some point or the other had one or all of these words come to mind when dealing with a tailor and therefore, can relate when I say, “Tailors are a necessary evil”.
Tailors can either make your looks or mar your mood, The reason you decide to sew that fine Aso-ebi material into a hot dress for that Owambe next Saturday is for it to fit right and to look drop dead gorgeous.
So my tailor is pretty good at what she does and she knows it. Her clothes are well fitting and need little or no adjustment. Bet, before she makes the dress…chaaaiii!!
I learnt the hard way to never give out the right date for the event, to prevent heart attack or irrational behaviour.
Has it worked?
Well, not in all cases. I have so many tailor stories but for now, I’ll share two scenarios with you;
Not listening: So I give her the material and style, say 3 weeks to the event,But I don’t tell her.
I make it sound urgent.
She collects all and tells me to come on a certain day for fitting, I call her the day before and she reconfirms the time. I arrive her shop bright and early, eager to try on my new dress…
“Aunty Toyin, e ka san” *means good afternoon*. She turns to look at me with a shock on her face and then sudden guilt. Lying next to her machine is my material, still neatly folded in the bag. Untouched. She gets defensive and starts complaining about the many jobs she has to do …err… not my business. Give me my dress! There’s a lot of screaming and threats… finally, I get tired then give her an additional one week.
Fast forward 3 days to the event, she calls me and asks “What style did you choose again?” …
The Wrong Style: This time I decide that since my dress never comes out on time, I might as well just give her 1 week to the event. Again, she takes the material and style.
“Ah, your weight keeps changing o, come jor, let me take your measurements again”. I stand still while she does so, I check on her 2 days after and my material has been cut…pheew, we’re getting somewhere. Four days after, I check on her again, the bottom part of my dress is ready.
“Oooo, Stop stressing me, you’re dress will be ready by Friday”.
I head straight to her shop after work on Friday, The dress is ready. bet… Staring right back at me is NOT the style I chose. Its cut, colours and materials added has nothing to do with what I chose,I can feel the build up inside.
When will killing be legal? The knots are loosening up in my head…explosion!! The words are flying out with no control.
All the while, Aunty Toyin has a puzzled look on her face, then a frown, She picks up the dress, Looks at it, Looks at me.
“Calm down, I’ll adjust it. Oya sit down now, pele, ma binu *means sorry*.
She gets to work, I walk out of her shop to breathe a little,Maybe a walk will do. She doesn’t even look back, she knows me too well, by the time, I return, there’s a bottle of Malt waiting for me. She tells me her assistant will go buy me fruits when am ready, I look at her and shake my head. An hour and a half later, my dress is ready. It fits to a T.
I still have no words. Aunty Toyin smiles and says: “Ehen tell Shola that she should resend the style she wanted for that purple material” …smh.
Do you have a Tailor story? Share yours in the comment section.